We’ve all known that special woman who seems to embody our idea of a great mom and all moms want to hear from their children that they were great moms. Dr. Linda Mintle share four characteristics of a great mom.
1. A great mom is one who focuses on the positives.
This doesn’t mean your children are perfect or that you should exaggerate their talents. It simply means that you look for the positives and voice those often, building up their sense of confidence and esteem.
Negative words are long remembered and often more powerful than a few sparse positive words, so think twice about the power of your tongue. Too many grownups in therapy tell me they still feel the sting of cruel words, put downs and negativity spoken by a parent when they were kids. Your words have the power to build up or tear down. Be the cheerleader your children need. Offer hope and encouragement on a regular basis.
“Gracious words are like a honeycomb, sweetness to the soul and health to the body.” Proverbs 16:24
2. A great mom is one who holds her ground, knowing she is doing what is good for her children.
Moms are not a child’s friend! Discipline matters and is needed. So a good mom defines the rules and is clear about expectations. She is in sync with her spouse and operating as a team with the same rules, not allowing children to pit one parent against the other.
“For the moment all discipline seems painful rather than pleasant, but later it yields the peaceful fruit of righteousness to those who have been trained by it.” Hebrews 12:11
3. A great mom creates a safe home.
A mother who practices patience, holds her temper and can soothe her children when they hurt, is a great mom. She apologizes when she is wrong and offers grace and forgiveness. A great mom exercises self-control and doesn’t allow her anger to get out of control and frighten her children. She also doesn’t give her children the silent treatment when upset. Moms and dads create an atmosphere of safety that leads to a secure attachment in a child. The way a mom responds to problems is part of what creates that safe space.
“But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, self-control; against such things there is no law.” Galatians 5:22-23
4. A great mom prays the scriptures over her children.
“Prayers permeated with the Word of God bring about changes in our children and keep us in touch with God’s priorities.”
She suggests we pray for safety, character, relationships, our child’s future and more. Prayer is our most powerful parenting tool.
“Then children were brought to him that he might lay his hands on them and pray. The disciples rebuked the people, but Jesus said, ‘Let the little children come to me and do not hinder them, for to such belongs the kingdom of heaven.’ And he laid his hands on them and went away.” Matthew 19:13-15
This mother’s day, when all the cards and gifts are beautifully presented, think about what you can do to be a great mom.