Bronywn Lea says we’re missing something big in the way we’re looking at relationships between men & women in the church. When we buy into our culture’s narrative that the only destination in that scenario is a romantic one, we’re losing sight of an extraordinary reality – the family of God.

“I think what we’re missing is really a very central part of the way scripture addresses us as believers, and that is it addresses us as the family of God. The children of God.”

“And we do have this really individualist society where – you know – I have a relationship with Jesus. And I am adopted into his family, and I am saved.”

There are so many memorable metaphors in the pages of the Bible. This is not one of them.

“I realized this is not a metaphor. The Bible is full of metaphors. It talks of us being the temple, and living stones, and the vine, and sheep, and all of these things which are deep, rich teaching metaphors. But when it talks about family, that is not a metaphor. It is actually a reality of the way that God now sees us. He’s not just like a father to us. He actually is a Father.”

“This is what bowled the Apostle John over in 1st John. He says, ‘Behold, what love The Father has given to us that we should be called Children of God!’ And that is what we all are! It’s true! We have become children of God. And if it is true – and not just a figure of speech, not just a metaphor, that we are children of God – then if we share the same Father, we really are siblings to one another. And that’s not an image. That’s the truth. It’s going to be true for eternity.”

If we neglect the incredible possibilities of God’s family, we’re missing something truly special.

“So what I think we’ve been missing as the church is just how do we live now as a community where we see one another as brothers and sisters? And that is a whole different way of seeing the gendered people around us – not just as potential partners or potential dating pools. That’s a language we can access, and that we can use. And it is right there in the scripture.”


Bronwyn Lea authors the tremendously titled Beyond Awkward Side Hugs: Living as Christian Brothers and Sisters in a Sex-Crazed World.

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On the Road with Bronwyn Lea