One of the hardest truths to grasp is the extent to which we are cherished by God. We say prayers to “our Father,” yet walk in the world as orphans, hoping we’re doing enough to make Him glance in our direction and dispense a bit of favor on us.

So many people I meet feel “less than,” unseen and unheard. We vie with each other for attention through our accomplishments, our money, houses and things we own. But if we’re honest, we know that’s a fragile, fleeting thing. If we have the courage to look deeper, we find a connection to a lie that we’ve been nurturing and feeding, embracing the identity inherent in the lie, that we aren’t worth hearing . Every lie has a root — a beginning that set the stage whereby we played our role as we saw it for years without realizing we were deceived. We easily accept information that fit the character on the stage, never questioning the lines we were given. While each of us has a different root, the fruit is so often the same. Fear. Shame. We close in on ourselves for protection. Often we quit even trying to communicate who we are and become what we’re expected to be. We lose our voice and the very thing that makes us unique.

This was my story. Even now, it’s so hard to exchange the persona for the person. To admit the truth because the lie more easily fits what the world wants to see. One of my earliest memories was standing, small and vulnerable, before two great giants of men; my grandfather and great grandfather. They were focused on each other, engrossed in conversation in German. I had a simple task — to tell them dinner was ready. Put up to it by my mom and grandma, it was something I should be able to do. I spoke. They ignored. I spoke louder. They continued to talk to teach other, unaware or unwilling to admit that I was there. Half a century later, I still remember how foolish, shamed and embarrassed I felt. Unseen. Unheard. Unimportant.

Then, some years later, sexual abuse by my other grandfather over several years confirmed what I already knew — that I was unimportant, unvalued, unheard. How can someone abuse a person of value and importance? No, it must be that I didn’t deserve what others so easily received: respect, love, honor. I became someone who hid in plain sight. In so many ways I became invisible. Quiet. Acceptable but never quite accepted.

In 2008 I had a big pity party during a prayer class I was enrolled in. The instructor didn’t remember my name and of course I took that as a reinforcement of all the ways I was “less than.” But God — the two most powerful words in the Bible — came so near to me. He impressed my spirit that I was His, called by His name. That night I had a vivid dream of a bright blue sky, a brilliant sun and an iridescent, shimmering presence floating through the air. I heard the words, “remember disparia.” When I awoke, I wrote the word down and Googled it. Cold fingers seemed to grip my heart as I looked at the definition. It’s a Romanian sourced word that means “invisible” or “disappearing.” In my spirit, I knew, through the power of the Holy Spirit’s instruction, that I was looking at the enemy’s strategy against me. He knows he can’t take away our salvation, so he seeks to disrupt our relationship with our Father; the purpose and plan that we were created for.

But Jesus, through His obedient sacrifice, death and resurrection, has won the battle, not only for our souls, but for our lives. We are no longer orphans, but His sons and daughters, chosen, redeemed, seen, heard and highly valued. When we call to Him, He hears us (Psalm 34:4). We don’t stand before Him unseen and unheard. We don’t have to turn away in shame as I did so many years ago. We can look to Him and He will make our face radiate with joy (Psalm 34:5). The joy of knowing beyond all shadow of doubt that we are known, seen, heard, loved deeply and intentionally. God proved His love for us when He sent his son, Jesus, whom he deeply loved, to the cross for us. For all of us.

If you have trouble believing that our Father loves you and desires a close, intimate relationship with you, go to a mature believer, confess your fears, your sins, your struggles. Bring them to the light of day, out of the clutches of your enemy who works in darkness. Our Father wants to bring each of us to Himself in a deeper way. We need to be healed from the strongholds that stand in the way of a deep, loving and joy filled relationship with our Father.

Let’s pray: “Father, I want to believe that you love me, hear me, see me, and answer my prayers. You know my heart and the healing that I need. Forgive my sins, create in me a clean heart and forgive me for believing the enemy’s lies about who I am. Thank you for loving me, restoring me, and giving me a future and a hope. Help me to walk in my true identity as a much beloved child.
In Jesus’ name, Amen.”