“…[The LORD] delivered me from all my fears…” (Psalm 34:4).

Fear. It tries to rob us of all the joy, beauty, love in life. Fear is nothing but an ugly, nasty thief.

But once you face your biggest fears in the eye, they no longer have control over you, no longer have a grip on you, hold you down.

October 2nd, 2016. Started like any other Sunday.

Until about 6pm.

My husband Paul and I were just sitting down to relax, when my phone rang. It was Mom. “Caroline…We have a problem…”

Without another thought, Paul and I were on our way to my parents’ house.

My dad had a stroke. Life would never be the same for any of us.

Ultimately he would pass from this life into the next on March 23rd, 2017. He fought valiantly, but his body just gave out.

Dad wasn’t known for being the “warm and fuzzy” type. He was the “big, strong, macho” guy. But in the six months after his stroke, we all saw the softer side. He wasn’t afraid to show love, he wasn’t afraid to pray for his children, to tell them that he was praying for them.

He sought the Lord, and the Lord sought him, bringing Dad peace and comfort, taking away any fears, in preparation from this life to the next.

Saying good-bye to a parent is one of the toughest life events that one can face. One of the biggest fears.

Thanks be to God for God’s constant care for us who are left behind. The hope we have in Christ, new life, everlasting life, resurrection, one day being reunited again. The love, peace, and comfort we give to one another. We are stronger together. The body of Christ.

“…[The LORD] delivered me from all my fears…” (Psalm 34:4).

One of the ways I take care of myself—physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually—is running. I run three or four times in a typical week. It’s something I started doing almost seven years ago.

When I was younger, “athletic” would not be a term to describe me. I was the one always chosen last or next-to-last in Gym class. And after my last Gym class halfway through my sophomore year in high school, the weight gain commenced. At my heaviest, my 5’5” frame carried around 200 pounds.

It’s very lonely to hide behind all that weight. There comes a time to break out of the shell. By the grace and strength of God, God helped me face it and brought me through to the other side. After some time and a lot of hard work and discipline.

When I was 22, almost 23, 17 years ago, I joined Weight Watchers. After about a year and a half, I lost 55 pounds. It was a rebirth of sorts for me. I became more outgoing and social, channeling the true extrovert that I was meant to be.

As a runner, the ultimate challenge is a marathon. 26.2 miles.

I have done half marathons, but when I saw the date of the Twin Cities Marathon for 2017, I knew I had to do it. October 1, 2017. Almost a year to the day that Dad had his stroke.

The marathon. It would give me the chance to leave behind what was the most challenging year in my adult life, to lay it all behind—the grief, the stress, the loss—to seek God and allow God to do God’s work in me; a way to move forward.

I am very thankful for my husband Paul, who supported me throughout the whole process. We sought the advice from a friend of ours, Reid, who works with resistance stretching, to help prepare me to be in the best shape to do this race.

Running a marathon, training for a marathon, is quite the commitment. You can’t do it halfway. It’s all or nothing. If you try to do it halfway, you’ll end up hurt. Injured.
Early morning runs. You find yourself thinking that a 10-mile training run is a “short” run. Perspective changes. It’s a mental as well as physical game.

Less than two months before the race, I ended up battling some sciatic and plantar fasciitis issues. I couldn’t run, and my running the marathon was in jeopardy.

I’m not the most “patient” patient, as I never had to deal with injuries before. I felt defeated. Deflated.

This race was bigger than myself. Yes, I was doing it for myself, to put behind this tough year; yes, I was doing it for that overweight girl who was chosen last for everything. I was also doing it for Dad, for my family, and I did it to raise money for the American Heart Association and the Saint Paul Area Synod, ELCA.

“…[The LORD] delivered me from all my fears…” (Psalm 34:4).

I showed up at the starting line on October 1. I was going to run as far as I could.

5 hours, 56 minutes, 31 seconds later, I was crossing the finish line. I couldn’t believe it. 13 of those miles with wind and rain in my face.

I couldn’t have done it without the love and support of my husband Paul, as he had to live with me through my training, and he got me to the starting line and followed me around Minneapolis and Saint Paul, keeping everyone updated with my progress; my family and friends who prayed for me and cheered me on, both in person and virtually; without Reid and his help and training…

And I couldn’t have done any of it without God, who carried me that 26.2 miles, who brought these wonderful, beautiful people into my life.

“…[The LORD] delivered me from all my fears…” (Psalm 34:4).

After a marathon, your life changes forever. You truly have the confidence to face whatever may come your way. Seeking and trusting the Lord, I have truly been delivered. Thanks be to God.