“Good, clear, concise communication is vital.”
Comedian Ryan O’Quinn gives this advice to women – clarity is key.
“Don’t think for a second that we [men] can infer. Not one of our superpowers at all. So if you say something, we may think you mean something else. And unless it’s the thing that you want to hear, we’re probably not going to hear anything other than that. No parenthetical statements; we just won’t get it.”
“Don’t hint about Valentine’s Day, don’t hint about that present that you want. Just say it and that way we will avoid all kinds of confusion.”
Clear communication also means clear affirmations. Pausing to honor your spouse increases the intimacy between you. Here’s an example:
“I so appreciate how you get up and go to work every day when there are guys who are in and out of jobs all over the place. Thank you for working so hard.”
In his book , Ryan describes this as ‘clapping loudly for your spouse.’ The world sends us all kinds of harsh messages about how we’re not good enough, but we can drown them out by building up our spouse – privately and in front of others.
This habit is especially important if you have children. They need to see what respect and honor look like up close.
“We’re training up the kids who are coming behind us. The next generation are going to look like us, walk like us, act like us. If you want to teach your kids how loving parents are to treat one another, the best way to do that is to set a great example of marriage in front of them.”
When a son or daughter sees parents who treat each other well, laugh together, and invest in their relationship, it creates a sense of stability that will lead to a healthy, strong family. Ryan encourages us to choose our words well, pursue God, and keep a sense of humor in every season of the marriage.
Key Scriptures: Joshua 1:9
Featured Songs: Love Take Me Over by Steven Curtis Chapman; We Belong Together by Steven Curtis Chapman; All About Love by Steven Curtis Chapman
