She’d come to Hollywood to pursue her dream, but for Andrea Logan White, success as a model and an actress didn’t come with the fulfillment she expected.
“I moved to Hollywood with three hundred fifty dollars in my bank account and no way to pay my bills. I had a dream and stars in my eyes and that’s all I knew!”
“So that led me to some bad choices. I hung out with Playboy Playmates, and that was my introduction to Hollywood – partying at the Playboy Mansion. Hugh Hefner was – believe it or not – kind of like a father figure to me. I feel like God protected me from a lot of what could have happened in that lifestyle. Hugh treated me like a daughter.”
Her life was increasingly running on two tracks. On one hand, she found success in her industry, but on the other – she was miserable.
“My roommate was Hugh’s girlfriend, and I was involved in jobs where I compromised and did some things that I didn’t want to do. But I feel like I am who I am today because of those poor choices. I was in the party crowd – sex, drugs, and rock n’ roll. Cocaine. Mercedes and perfect, beautiful women. I walked into the Playboy Mansion and there were Leonardo Dicaprio and George Clooney. Everything looked awesome and perfect, but it wasn’t.”
“It was a very hard few years of questioning. Why am I here? What am I doing?“
At the end of herself, she called out to God. In her car at a Hollywood stoplight, she began to pray.
“I cried out to God. I said, ‘If you’re here, and you’re real – show me who You are! Because I’ve lost my will to live, and I don’t even know why I’m on this earth. I have no reason for why I’m here.’
“And sure enough, at that moment somebody beeped their horn, and pointed to their car radio. As the man drove away, he had a bumper sticker that said ‘Jesus loves you’ and the call sign of a radio station. I turned to the radio station, and it was a pastor repeating the prayer that I had just cried out to God! So that was God manifesting himself! And I will never forget that moment. Slowly but surely God started working on my heart.”
Andrea Logan White is an actress, producer, and the part owner of PureFlix. Her new book is called Perfectly Unfinished: Finding Beauty in the Midst of Brokenness.On the Road with Andrea Logan White